(no subject)
So now that you guys know Everything Important There Is To Know About Newsies: The Film, it's time to talk about the live show!
Some general notes, before we begin: the sets were amazing, and the dancing was also pretty fantastic. They did a pretty stellar job of translating the energetic, acrobatic feel that made the movie choreography genuinely impressive, while quietly toning down the signature pelvis-obsessed hilarious awkwardness that Kenny Ortega (known for his work on Newsies, the High School Musical franchise, and various Michael Jackson enterprises) brings to all his projects.
Of course this means that they pretty much replaced every pelvic thrust with a properly toe-pointed ballet twirl, which is . . . not less hilarious for a set of rugged, hardcore, cigar-smoking street urchins, but I AM NOT COMPLAINING.
So for that alone, it is worth it! As far as the changes made to the songs and the storyline . . . well, we were slightly more confused by those.
Our confusion began when the show opened, not with signature number "Carrying the Banner," but with "Santa Fe," revamped as a duet between Jack and Tragic Moppet Crutchy!
(![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
innerbrat: All right, I've jumped ship. Jack/Crutchy all the way!)
And indeed, Jack does spend most of this song with his arm around Crutchy's shoulders singing about how Crutchy should run away with him to Santa Fe, "where your friends are more like family." We think this is the Newsies version of a proposal.
Crutchy, meanwhile, seems to think that Santa Fe is a magical place that heals all wounds and sings about how he will discard his crutch and freely bound across the open spaces. Which, okay, maybe in Newsies universe Santa Fe really is a famous saint's shrine! WHO KNOWS.
While we are all busy blinking at Crutchy's narrative promotion to Jack's soulmate, the musical goes into "Carrying the Banner," which has more explicit talk about how hungry and poor the Newsies are, no inexplicable intrusion of a lady singing about her lost son Patrick, and a new line for the nuns, who are worried about how the Newsies wander "lost and depraved." Don't worry, sisters, they already cut out the pelvic thrusts and chest bumps!
Meanwhile, unconcerned about the Newsies' stomachs or souls, we meet Pulitzer. WHO IS AMAZING. He smirks, moustache-strokes, and evilly laughs his way through his song about how he is going to cheat the Newsies out of their extra ten cents. HE FORCES HIS MINIONS TO DO A KICKLINE. IT IS A THING OF BEAUTY.
We are still making delighted faces at each other about this when we go back to Jack and his first meeting with David and Les . . . when we discover the reason that Crutchy got an upgrade: musical David is awful. He's a nervous, gormless stereotype who seems to have traded in all his spine to his baby brother Les, who, by contrast, struts around ANGRILY BELLOWING at everyone with all his ten-year-old might. Jack does not seem particularly interested him and we are not either.
(![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
bookelfe: I MISS DAVID'S GORM.
shati: I MISS IT TOO. And his amazing bitchiness!
bookelfe: Yes . . . I think that may be what I meant by gorm.)
Then we are distracted from mourning for the gormful, delightfully cranky David of the film by the introduction of Ann-Margret's character Medda, who seems to have tragically misplaced all her clothes.
However, Ann-Margret got off light compared to Bill Pullman, who has been transformed into . . . a PLUCKY GIRL REPORTER LOVE INTEREST FOR JACK!
Jack pops up in her box to harass her with come-ons and refuses to leave despite her repeated efforts to send him away. We are unimpressed with what interviews have been billing as "hotter, flirtier, less broody" Jack.
BUT THEN he wins her over with the reveal that underneath all his crude flirtatiousness . . . he is a SENSITIVE ARTISTIC SOUL! He sketches her picture, sings about how he fell in love with her at first sight and never met a girl like her before, and exists, stage right.
Spunky Girl Reporter Katharine is like "I am a grown-up with a job and you are a teenaged newsboy, but I guess you are kind of cute after all," thus revealing that the one consistent character trait she shares with Bill Pullman is INAPPROPRIATENESS.
Meanwhile, we facepalm collectively.
The next day: the price hike! David and Les show up late to support their plucky orphan friends, because, well, I quote:
DAVID: Sorry I'm late! We had to help our MOM.
NEWSIES: You have a mother?
LES: YES. And we have a father TOO!
WAY TO RUB IT IN, KIDS.
Anyway the Newsies have other things to worry about than David and Les' parents, because the strike is on and it's time for "The World Will Know!" Jack is extremely angry about his singing.
genarti: . . . I'm kind of worried that he's going to have an aneurysm . . .
Spunky Girl Reporter Katherine, clad in hilarious hot pink, is also there to get a statement from Jack and talk about "David and Goliath," which is funny because she never actually meets the new, downgraded, less exciting David or gets his name. She also drops a line about how Katherine Plumber is her PSEUDONYM, which sets off an excited round of guessing from among our audience:
wickedtrue: She's definitely someone's daughter or niece or something.
innerbrat and setsthingsright: She's TEDDY ROOSEVELT's niece!
genarti: Well, if it doesn't turn out her real name is Francis Sullivan I'm going to be VERY DISAPPOINTED.
Then Katherine goes home and sings about how she wants to be a real, legitimate, respected reporter on a real legitimate beat! We are all for this until she stops singing about how she wants to be a reporter and help those plucky kids, and starts singing about how one of those plucky kids is actually pretty hot . . .
bookelfe and genarti: Katherine! That is inappropriate!
KATHERINE: It's time for BOYS to become MEN!
bookelfe and genarti: @_______@
BUT BACK TO THE NEWSIES. Jack has gone to visit Spot Conlon . . . OFFSCREEN. TRAVESTY. We mourn for this as David leads the Newsies in a bizarre, way slowed-down, completely lifeless version of "Seize the Day" before they get into position to blockade off the Hearst offices. A couple of kids arrive to act as scabs and try to break the strike; we are waiting for the big fight scene, but - wait! "Let's try talking to them," says Jack of the sensitive soul, and implores his fellow Newsies to think of all the children.
"Oh, well, if it's for the children," say the strikebreakers, throw down their newspapers, and join the strike!
WELL. THAT WAS EASY.
But then some corrupt bullies-for-hire and policemen show up to beat all the kids up so we get a fight scene anyway. Crutchy is dragged off to jail! Various and sundry Newsies are injured! Worst of all, BROOKLYN NEVER COMES.
"CRUTCHYYYYYYYYY!" cries Jack, and launches into a sad reprise of "Santa Fe." Everyone ends Act 1 very depressed, including me.
(bookelfe: BUT WHERE WAS SPOT CONLON!
innerbrat: Okay, but actually, this was the first act of a really good romance! There's Jack and Crutchy, and then he gets his head turned by the other woman, and so Crutchy gets hurt, and then in the second half . . .
bookelfe: BUT WHERE WAS SPOT CONLON!)
Act II begins with all the other Newsies are there tap-dancing and singing "King of New York" with Katherine, who proves definitively that she is not Bill Pullman by doing some high kicks in her new, orange outfit.
But . . . where is Jack? Katherine and David go to hunt him down and find him . . . PAINTING. His sensitive soul has been injured by the VIOLENCE to the CHILDREN and by going (offscreen) to visit POOR TRAGIC CRUTCHY. He can't lead the strike anymore!
(We all are beginning to miss lulzy inept Christian Bale.)
Also, Tiny Angry Les is extremely upset about this, because, you see, he's been getting lots of dates since the strike began. (Lest you forget: LES IS TEN.)
Eventually Jack gets talked into holding a rally for the strike that night . . . but then his resolve is again shaken when Pulitzer invites him to his office to reveal that
*drumroll, please*
KATHERINE IS PULITZER'S DAUGHTER.
And, in case this is not enough, Pulitzer reminds Jack to THINK OF THE CHILDREN.
Then he locks Jack up downstairs with the HELLO PLOT POINT PRINTING PRESS BY THE WAY DID WE MENTION THERE'S A PRINTING PRESS DOWN HERE. But that's okay, because: BROOKLYN IS FINALLY HERE! Led by a short but extremely buff Spot Conlon, they march, thump their chests and sing a song called, creatively, "Brooklyn's Here" which I feel a desperate need to acquire and use as my ringtone.
Unfortunately, these are the last lines Spot Conlon will get in the show.
So Brooklyn shows up to the rally, but Jack does not! David flailily attempts to lead it himself, then steps hastily and gratefully down as soon as Jack finally appears.
(shati and bookelfe: DAVID, WHERE IS YOUR GORM?)
But Jack, moved by his sensitive artistic depression and his sadness at Katherine's betrayal, implores all his fellow Newsies to cease the strike and think of the CHILDREN. Everyone is very betrayed! The rally dissolves!
But then Katherine is there to make out with Jack on a roof and sing a sappy duet and encourage him to find a better way to lead the strike and help him recruit all the children of New York to join in the strike using the HELLO PLOT POINT PRINTING PRESS! She also brings her upper-class friends along to help out the poor plucky orphans:
UPPER-CLASS FRIEND ONE: Hello! I'm Darcy, the son of the owner of the Sun!
UPPER-CLASS FRIEND TWO: And I'm Bill!
JACK: Hah, and I guess you're the son of William Randolph Hearst!
BILL: *awkward* er yes um so OKAY IT'S SO EXCITING TO HELP OUT POOR PEOPLE!
From there, it's time for "Once and For All" and deus ex Teddy Roosevelt, whose presence is actually slightly better explained in the play: apparently he's sleeping with Medda and she dragged him in to yell at Puliter! And yell at Pulitzer he does:
TEDDY ROOSEVELT: Normally, I use the word 'bully' as an expression of approval. But to you, sir, I say, simply, BULLY!
Properly chastised, Pulitzer agrees to lower the price of papes and to allow the newsboys to sell back their unsold papers to the company. Then he offers sensitive artist Jack a job as a political cartoonist! Also Katherine loves him and is totally willing to abandon her career and go to Santa Fe with him if he wants! Also Crutchy is free and there is a touching embrace, followed by some dancing bows! Which, admittedly, are amazing, because those kids can hella dance.
HAPPY ENDING FOR ALL.
Epilogue:
areyoumymemmy: You know, I thought at first that following this up with watching the movie version would be too much, but . . . I'm actually really excited about going back and seeing the real version of David now!
bookelfe: YAY SPOT CONLON!
shati: YAY DAVID'S GORM!
And so we did, all nine valiant souls of us, because my friends are the best and the dorkiest of all.
Some general notes, before we begin: the sets were amazing, and the dancing was also pretty fantastic. They did a pretty stellar job of translating the energetic, acrobatic feel that made the movie choreography genuinely impressive, while quietly toning down the signature pelvis-obsessed hilarious awkwardness that Kenny Ortega (known for his work on Newsies, the High School Musical franchise, and various Michael Jackson enterprises) brings to all his projects.
Of course this means that they pretty much replaced every pelvic thrust with a properly toe-pointed ballet twirl, which is . . . not less hilarious for a set of rugged, hardcore, cigar-smoking street urchins, but I AM NOT COMPLAINING.
So for that alone, it is worth it! As far as the changes made to the songs and the storyline . . . well, we were slightly more confused by those.
Our confusion began when the show opened, not with signature number "Carrying the Banner," but with "Santa Fe," revamped as a duet between Jack and Tragic Moppet Crutchy!
(
innerbrat: All right, I've jumped ship. Jack/Crutchy all the way!)And indeed, Jack does spend most of this song with his arm around Crutchy's shoulders singing about how Crutchy should run away with him to Santa Fe, "where your friends are more like family." We think this is the Newsies version of a proposal.
Crutchy, meanwhile, seems to think that Santa Fe is a magical place that heals all wounds and sings about how he will discard his crutch and freely bound across the open spaces. Which, okay, maybe in Newsies universe Santa Fe really is a famous saint's shrine! WHO KNOWS.
While we are all busy blinking at Crutchy's narrative promotion to Jack's soulmate, the musical goes into "Carrying the Banner," which has more explicit talk about how hungry and poor the Newsies are, no inexplicable intrusion of a lady singing about her lost son Patrick, and a new line for the nuns, who are worried about how the Newsies wander "lost and depraved." Don't worry, sisters, they already cut out the pelvic thrusts and chest bumps!
Meanwhile, unconcerned about the Newsies' stomachs or souls, we meet Pulitzer. WHO IS AMAZING. He smirks, moustache-strokes, and evilly laughs his way through his song about how he is going to cheat the Newsies out of their extra ten cents. HE FORCES HIS MINIONS TO DO A KICKLINE. IT IS A THING OF BEAUTY.
We are still making delighted faces at each other about this when we go back to Jack and his first meeting with David and Les . . . when we discover the reason that Crutchy got an upgrade: musical David is awful. He's a nervous, gormless stereotype who seems to have traded in all his spine to his baby brother Les, who, by contrast, struts around ANGRILY BELLOWING at everyone with all his ten-year-old might. Jack does not seem particularly interested him and we are not either.
(
bookelfe: I MISS DAVID'S GORM.shati: I MISS IT TOO. And his amazing bitchiness!bookelfe: Yes . . . I think that may be what I meant by gorm.) Then we are distracted from mourning for the gormful, delightfully cranky David of the film by the introduction of Ann-Margret's character Medda, who seems to have tragically misplaced all her clothes.
However, Ann-Margret got off light compared to Bill Pullman, who has been transformed into . . . a PLUCKY GIRL REPORTER LOVE INTEREST FOR JACK!
Jack pops up in her box to harass her with come-ons and refuses to leave despite her repeated efforts to send him away. We are unimpressed with what interviews have been billing as "hotter, flirtier, less broody" Jack.
BUT THEN he wins her over with the reveal that underneath all his crude flirtatiousness . . . he is a SENSITIVE ARTISTIC SOUL! He sketches her picture, sings about how he fell in love with her at first sight and never met a girl like her before, and exists, stage right.
Spunky Girl Reporter Katharine is like "I am a grown-up with a job and you are a teenaged newsboy, but I guess you are kind of cute after all," thus revealing that the one consistent character trait she shares with Bill Pullman is INAPPROPRIATENESS.
Meanwhile, we facepalm collectively.
The next day: the price hike! David and Les show up late to support their plucky orphan friends, because, well, I quote:
DAVID: Sorry I'm late! We had to help our MOM.
NEWSIES: You have a mother?
LES: YES. And we have a father TOO!
WAY TO RUB IT IN, KIDS.
Anyway the Newsies have other things to worry about than David and Les' parents, because the strike is on and it's time for "The World Will Know!" Jack is extremely angry about his singing.
genarti: . . . I'm kind of worried that he's going to have an aneurysm . . . Spunky Girl Reporter Katherine, clad in hilarious hot pink, is also there to get a statement from Jack and talk about "David and Goliath," which is funny because she never actually meets the new, downgraded, less exciting David or gets his name. She also drops a line about how Katherine Plumber is her PSEUDONYM, which sets off an excited round of guessing from among our audience:
wickedtrue: She's definitely someone's daughter or niece or something.innerbrat and setsthingsright: She's TEDDY ROOSEVELT's niece!genarti: Well, if it doesn't turn out her real name is Francis Sullivan I'm going to be VERY DISAPPOINTED.Then Katherine goes home and sings about how she wants to be a real, legitimate, respected reporter on a real legitimate beat! We are all for this until she stops singing about how she wants to be a reporter and help those plucky kids, and starts singing about how one of those plucky kids is actually pretty hot . . .
bookelfe and genarti: Katherine! That is inappropriate!KATHERINE: It's time for BOYS to become MEN!
bookelfe and genarti: @_______@BUT BACK TO THE NEWSIES. Jack has gone to visit Spot Conlon . . . OFFSCREEN. TRAVESTY. We mourn for this as David leads the Newsies in a bizarre, way slowed-down, completely lifeless version of "Seize the Day" before they get into position to blockade off the Hearst offices. A couple of kids arrive to act as scabs and try to break the strike; we are waiting for the big fight scene, but - wait! "Let's try talking to them," says Jack of the sensitive soul, and implores his fellow Newsies to think of all the children.
"Oh, well, if it's for the children," say the strikebreakers, throw down their newspapers, and join the strike!
WELL. THAT WAS EASY.
But then some corrupt bullies-for-hire and policemen show up to beat all the kids up so we get a fight scene anyway. Crutchy is dragged off to jail! Various and sundry Newsies are injured! Worst of all, BROOKLYN NEVER COMES.
"CRUTCHYYYYYYYYY!" cries Jack, and launches into a sad reprise of "Santa Fe." Everyone ends Act 1 very depressed, including me.
(
bookelfe: BUT WHERE WAS SPOT CONLON!innerbrat: Okay, but actually, this was the first act of a really good romance! There's Jack and Crutchy, and then he gets his head turned by the other woman, and so Crutchy gets hurt, and then in the second half . . .bookelfe: BUT WHERE WAS SPOT CONLON!)Act II begins with all the other Newsies are there tap-dancing and singing "King of New York" with Katherine, who proves definitively that she is not Bill Pullman by doing some high kicks in her new, orange outfit.
But . . . where is Jack? Katherine and David go to hunt him down and find him . . . PAINTING. His sensitive soul has been injured by the VIOLENCE to the CHILDREN and by going (offscreen) to visit POOR TRAGIC CRUTCHY. He can't lead the strike anymore!
(We all are beginning to miss lulzy inept Christian Bale.)
Also, Tiny Angry Les is extremely upset about this, because, you see, he's been getting lots of dates since the strike began. (Lest you forget: LES IS TEN.)
Eventually Jack gets talked into holding a rally for the strike that night . . . but then his resolve is again shaken when Pulitzer invites him to his office to reveal that
*drumroll, please*
KATHERINE IS PULITZER'S DAUGHTER.
And, in case this is not enough, Pulitzer reminds Jack to THINK OF THE CHILDREN.
Then he locks Jack up downstairs with the HELLO PLOT POINT PRINTING PRESS BY THE WAY DID WE MENTION THERE'S A PRINTING PRESS DOWN HERE. But that's okay, because: BROOKLYN IS FINALLY HERE! Led by a short but extremely buff Spot Conlon, they march, thump their chests and sing a song called, creatively, "Brooklyn's Here" which I feel a desperate need to acquire and use as my ringtone.
Unfortunately, these are the last lines Spot Conlon will get in the show.
So Brooklyn shows up to the rally, but Jack does not! David flailily attempts to lead it himself, then steps hastily and gratefully down as soon as Jack finally appears.
(
shati and bookelfe: DAVID, WHERE IS YOUR GORM?)But Jack, moved by his sensitive artistic depression and his sadness at Katherine's betrayal, implores all his fellow Newsies to cease the strike and think of the CHILDREN. Everyone is very betrayed! The rally dissolves!
But then Katherine is there to make out with Jack on a roof and sing a sappy duet and encourage him to find a better way to lead the strike and help him recruit all the children of New York to join in the strike using the HELLO PLOT POINT PRINTING PRESS! She also brings her upper-class friends along to help out the poor plucky orphans:
UPPER-CLASS FRIEND ONE: Hello! I'm Darcy, the son of the owner of the Sun!
UPPER-CLASS FRIEND TWO: And I'm Bill!
JACK: Hah, and I guess you're the son of William Randolph Hearst!
BILL: *awkward* er yes um so OKAY IT'S SO EXCITING TO HELP OUT POOR PEOPLE!
From there, it's time for "Once and For All" and deus ex Teddy Roosevelt, whose presence is actually slightly better explained in the play: apparently he's sleeping with Medda and she dragged him in to yell at Puliter! And yell at Pulitzer he does:
TEDDY ROOSEVELT: Normally, I use the word 'bully' as an expression of approval. But to you, sir, I say, simply, BULLY!
Properly chastised, Pulitzer agrees to lower the price of papes and to allow the newsboys to sell back their unsold papers to the company. Then he offers sensitive artist Jack a job as a political cartoonist! Also Katherine loves him and is totally willing to abandon her career and go to Santa Fe with him if he wants! Also Crutchy is free and there is a touching embrace, followed by some dancing bows! Which, admittedly, are amazing, because those kids can hella dance.
HAPPY ENDING FOR ALL.
Epilogue:
areyoumymemmy: You know, I thought at first that following this up with watching the movie version would be too much, but . . . I'm actually really excited about going back and seeing the real version of David now!bookelfe: YAY SPOT CONLON!shati: YAY DAVID'S GORM!And so we did, all nine valiant souls of us, because my friends are the best and the dorkiest of all.
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"Lost and depraved"--I'm pretty sure that's in the original too.
The rest: gah.
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The original lyric is actually "lost and afraid!" But that was before there had been explicit Newsie/Reporter, I suppose.
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HAHAha, oh, I weep because it is true!
That said, I too feel in need of the warm bath of the actual movie to cleanse me of the WHY decisions of this adaptation. ;_;
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