skygiants

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This post covers the weekend.

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FRIDAY

Restless sleep, but that's ok. Kind of lazed around in bed for a while before doing breakfast, and doing something unorthodox: placing an Instacart order. The new Strawberry Koia flavor was released ONLY at Wegman's, it's too far for me to Uber, I wanna try it, and this city is the last time we'll be anywhere near a Wegman's. I added other stuff to the order to make it worth their while.

Packed myself snacks and dinner, worked on Richmond Foodie Finds, and had gotten 2/3rds through my presentation rehearsal when the Instacart arrived.

Strawberry Koia (stock image from their IG):


I also got an avocado, some yogurt, and Drizzilicious Salted Caramel. Yes, still obsessed with these and aiming to try all of the flavors!


I had paused my masterclass timer to retrieve the delivery, and picked up again after putting everything away. 47 minutes seems to be my average (and I did work in more comments to make the info more applicable to non-performance students.) I had a snack and did a little research for potential Philly sightseeing. So far the rest of the week looks like this:

• Today, 2/13: Rehearsal with Koz, evening show
• Saturday 2/14: Doing laundry, 2 shows, possible meeting with our musician's union rep.
• Sunday 2/15: Two shows.
• Monday 2/16: Golden Day. Attending a Ringling Bros show at Xfinity Arena, possible outing with a friend.
• Tuesday 2/17: Picking up rental car, driving 2 hours to Delaware, giving masterclass. Running carworthy errands afterward if time allows. Returning rental car, dinner with my brother/fiancee and their family, and the evening show.
• Wednesday 2/18: Two shows. A friend wants to meet up so possibly that if I feel up for it.
• Thursday 2/19: Another friend meet-up for lunch. Company-sponsored tour of the African American Museum, which I have signed up to attend so that I can at least enjoy ONE cultural experience in Philly. One evening show.
• Friday 2/20: This is my only truly free day so I am trying to protect it from social things! Laundry rest please, and one evening show.
• Saturday 2/21: Two shows, my sister is coming to the matinee so she'll want to do a meal or hang out.
• Sunday 2/22: Brunch with another sister and her family, they're attending the matinee. Load out and packing for Pittsburgh.

Yeah, I'm kinda glad the other masterclasses got cancelled. For some people this schedule is nothing, but for me that amount of extroversion is a lot.

I walked to the theater early, nervous for rehearsal. The actors had been there already for several hours rehearsing with The Creatives, with DAR conducting and some keyboardists there to play some parts. I tiptoed around in the pit to get my horns set up, then filled my water bottle and dug around in my trunk until they were ready for us.

Rehearsal went pretty well. There is a new ending to one of the numbers so we rehearsed that a few times, then the decision was made to keep it and put it in the show. Another change was made to the ensemble, we rehearsed that for a while until The Creatives were satisfied with it and it was likewise added permanently. Next Koz had a list of things that he wanted to address, but thankfully most of them had to do with house audio meaning he was not asking US to change anything, but rather the Sound Department. They spent the next hour-or-so adjusting this-or-that level at Koz's direction until he was satisfied. It is hard to tell from the pit how much difference these changes make, but I hope it'll be an improvement for our audiences! We closed with tweaking a few articulation things, but overall the band did not get a lot of corrective notes, which is great! One can infer that we're doing a good job. And Koz made sure to come to the pit and tell us that :)

During the break before the evening show I chose to stay at the theater because I just did not feel like walking back in the bitter cold. I'd packed dinner, and took it to the warmest part of the building that I could find to eat and read my book. "The warmest part of the building" happens to overlook some offices of the Philadelphia Orchestra. I noticed some ads in the windows for the Curtis Institute of Music. Long ago, I auditioned for Curtis and was rejected. Funny how things work out.

The evening show was good. All of the new changes were incorporated. I was impressed with how the ensemble did them seamlessly, as though they'd always been a part of the show. That's why these people are professionals!! Personal playing-wise, I didn't do as well as last night's show. After 48 hours of being evaluated, my nerves were shot and my fight or flight kept trying to grab the wheel. I still did a very good job, but had some quavering notes due to nerves and a few small mistakes related to nerves.

After the show DAR was beaming. I think during intermission he got to talk with The Creatives and they were pleased. He showered us with complements and expressed gratitude for us. He's such a class act :) And his praise was much appreciated after spending two days wondering what The Creatives are thinking!

Also, I checked my socials before bed and saw that Full Blown Trombone Studio has posted an ad for my masterclass in March! So spiffy!


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SATURDAY

I was awake early to do laundry. Breakfast and coffee between elevator rides to switch stuff from washer to dryer. Folded and put away the laundry. Masterclass run-through was a whopping 49 minutes but I think it's because I should have stopped the timer at a point when the PPT got messed up.

Lunch and the walk to the theater. No Creatives in the audience. My nerves were still a bit high BUT it was a good show and a great crowd. After the show our musician's union rep met us backstage for a quick talk. Mostly he wanted to give us a paper copy of our contracts and go over a few points of it that can be difficult to understand, then opened the floor to any questions. We had a bunch, so there was back and forth on those topics for a while. Not sure that anything will actually get accomplished, but airing concerns at least gets them on the radar for the future.

Hustled back to the hotel for dinner, only a short break before having to turn right back around but at least it wasn't so cold out tonight!

At the theater there were some Valentine's Day surprises!
The Chip Kids got us all cards with little $1 lotto scratch cards attached.
Jasmine (ensemble/Babette and Wardrobe understudy) gave the band some lovely cards.
DAR got us a box of cookies to thank us for doing well in rehearsals, and our management team got us little treat bags with Valentines inside.


At our places in the pit we found "love notes" from Koz and DAR as well :p
Just things we'd rehearsed and that they'd like to change/improve. I didn't get any direct notes, which I count as a big win! There were some general ones for all of us, but for the most part it's poor DAR who has to implement a lot of the changes that Koz wants to see. These were in our notes because we all need to be aware of them so we can help make them happen (by watching and following DAR.)

For the evening show our union rep was in the audience for the first act and came to sit in the pit with us in the second act. This show was personally my worst one of the week. It's like, all of the tension I've been shoving down or trying to ignore came spilling out. It manifested, unfortunately, into SHAKING in my lips while I was trying to play delicate and exposed passages. The fact that it was ONLY happening during those specific parts tells me that it was psychological. Luckily I do not have many exposed lines but it was VERY annoying, and I had to then explain to Tim (trumpet) and Gary (drums, who is nearby this week) why I sounded shaky and weird.

I was able to calm down for the second half by reminding myself that despite his decades-long career and well-established mastery of his craft, Brian May himself still has Impostor Syndrome. Even a musical genius like him still has days where he doesn't play well. We (the entire company) have been evaluated and scrutinized a lot this week. This is my dream job...it means the world to me. Showing that I deserve to be here and not letting DAR down has been at the forefront of my mind all week. I have been putting a lot of pressure on myself, especially while Koz was here.

Thankfully, Sunday is supposed to be a normal 2-show day. I am hopeful that my nerves will settle back down, and I can get back to playing like I normally do.

(NOTE: RE: "Have you tried beta blockers?" No, I haven't, and I don't intend to. A: that's not what that medication is supposed to be used for, and B: there is dependency/withdrawal if you stop them. One becomes reliant on using beta blockers to be able to perform, rather than coping with fight or flight and developing an ability to perform despite it. I.e., beta blockers are not a solution for the problem, they just make it so you don't have to face the problem. To each their own and this is my choice.)

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SUNDAY

Normal morning stuff, coffee, breakfast, typing up this post. Prepping my room for housekeeping as I hope they'll come through on Monday. Doing a little research on the best way to get to Xfinity Arena for the circus on Monday.

I did a final run-through of my masterclass (I don't want to do one on Monday.) 47 minutes with only a bit of stumbletongue, that's all I can ask for.

The matinee was good. I played better, there was a little shaking but it was barely noticeable. The crowd was wonderful and enthusiastic. Back to the hotel for dinner and some decompression. Walking back for the evening show. Again, a decent show but I think we are all kind of mentally burnt and in need of a day off. Several folks will be visiting friends or family on the east coast, or going into NYC to blow off steam. 

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Monday: Golden Day. Seeing the circus, then hopefully having a quiet evening of resting and packing stuff to bring for this masterclass.

Tuesday: Busiest day of my time in Philly. 4-hour round trip drive, Delaware masterclass, dinner with my brother's family, evening show.