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Jul. 18th, 2011 11:51 amSo this weekend a whole bunch of us went to check out the opening of Film Forum's Essential Pre-Code double feature nights, which, by the way: AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME and my greatest sorrow is that I can't see EVERYTHING. ;____;
The first movie we saw was Two Seconds, in which Edward G. Robinson gets the electric chair and sees the Events Which Brought Him to This Sad Fate flash before his eyes. There are number of different morals that can be taken from this movie:
1. NEVER ditch your wingman. EVEN IF all your wingman wants to do is blow his cash on horses and hookers, sticking with your bro is still better than going off alone to a ten-cent dance hall, because . . .
2. NEVER rescue helpless-looking dance hall girls. They are only out for the money you make as a construction worker and will try to seduce you by talking to you about your passion: EDUCATION.
3. NEVER get drunk on dates. You may wake up and find yourself unexpectedly married to a lady who is only out for your money and won't even go to an educational lecture with you. :(
4. In fact, generally staying away from jazz and liquor is probably a good plan.
5. NEVER get into a fight with your best friend on top of a sixty-foot girder. It can only end poorly for one of you.
6. WOMEN ARE OUT FOR YOUR MONEY. AND EVIL.
Which made it kind of hilarious that the follow-up movie was Baby Face, which has a take much more along the lines of "women who decide to take control of their lives by manipulating men for money may be wrong, but . . . also kind of awesome?"
Admittedly 90% of this is due to Barbara Stanwyck's Lily, who won our hearts completely in the first five minutes by dumping hot coffee on a creepy groper's fingers, then, when he doesn't take the hint, calmly smashing him over the head with a bottle in between sips of beer.
( Cut for length, spoilers, images, Nietzsche, and Barbara Stanwyck being stone cold fantastic )
The first movie we saw was Two Seconds, in which Edward G. Robinson gets the electric chair and sees the Events Which Brought Him to This Sad Fate flash before his eyes. There are number of different morals that can be taken from this movie:
1. NEVER ditch your wingman. EVEN IF all your wingman wants to do is blow his cash on horses and hookers, sticking with your bro is still better than going off alone to a ten-cent dance hall, because . . .
2. NEVER rescue helpless-looking dance hall girls. They are only out for the money you make as a construction worker and will try to seduce you by talking to you about your passion: EDUCATION.
3. NEVER get drunk on dates. You may wake up and find yourself unexpectedly married to a lady who is only out for your money and won't even go to an educational lecture with you. :(
4. In fact, generally staying away from jazz and liquor is probably a good plan.
5. NEVER get into a fight with your best friend on top of a sixty-foot girder. It can only end poorly for one of you.
6. WOMEN ARE OUT FOR YOUR MONEY. AND EVIL.
Which made it kind of hilarious that the follow-up movie was Baby Face, which has a take much more along the lines of "women who decide to take control of their lives by manipulating men for money may be wrong, but . . . also kind of awesome?"
Admittedly 90% of this is due to Barbara Stanwyck's Lily, who won our hearts completely in the first five minutes by dumping hot coffee on a creepy groper's fingers, then, when he doesn't take the hint, calmly smashing him over the head with a bottle in between sips of beer.
( Cut for length, spoilers, images, Nietzsche, and Barbara Stanwyck being stone cold fantastic )
