(no subject)

I told tenillypo that, unfortunately, I had developed a lot of feelings about the Clone Wars, and she subsequently refused to let me leave her house without her favorite Clone Wars tie-in novels: Clone Wars Gambit: Stealth and its sequel Clone Wars Gambit: Siege.

....and I completely devoured them, because is the person that I am now.

The books revolve around Anakin and Obi-Wan's Top Secret Mission to try and stop a devastating bioweapon from being developed on a tiny backwater planet by a kidnapped scientist.

(VILLAIN: If you fail to comply, we will kill your mother!
SCIENTIST: oh no
VILLAIN: and also your sister and brother-in-law --
SCIENTIST: oh noooo
VILLAIN: AND your brother and sister-in-law --
SCIENTIST: yikes!!
VILLAIN: plus four or five close personal friends --
SCIENTIST: DAMMIT, WHY AM I SUCH A SOCIABLE PERSON?)

In the first book, as you may have guessed from the title, they are stealthy! In the second book, they are hiding out on the planet in a village under siege! At all times, they are constantly engaged in debates about the greater good, acceptable risk, and ethical Jedi conduct under late capitalism in a state of galactic war!

(ANAKIN: I cannot BELIEVE you, OBI-WAN, A JEDI, would argue in favor of LYING to this POOR COERCED SCIENTIST --
OBI-WAN: Just because we've only rescued FIFTEEN of her SIXTEEN potential hostages doesn't mean it's okay for her to create a devastating bio-weapon, Anakin!
ANAKIN: She has the right to make an informed choice and also! THE JEDI CODE! SAYS NO LYING! TO ANYONE! EV-
ANAKIN:
ANAKIN:
ANAKIN:
OBI-WAN: ....what halted your hissy fit, my friend?
ANAKIN: oh I just remembered I'm lying about my marriage to literally everybody including you is all, NEVERMIND WE'RE FINE LET'S GO LIE TO THE COERCED SCIENTIST
OBI-WAN: what
ANAKIN: what)

In the B-plot, Ahsoka befriends Obi-Wan's ex-girlfriend, a brilliant and heroic Jedi with shimmering blue hair and golden eyes who is suffering from a tragic fatal illness!

AHSOKA: Master, what happened to you?
TRAGIC JEDI MASTER TARIA DAMSIN: I ate some very bad shellfish once and now, unfortunately, I will never recover.
AHSOKA: ...
TRAGIC JEDI MASTER TARIA DAMSIN: Sometimes them's is just the breaks, kid.

(As a sidenote, the books have pretty minimal clone stuff -- though most of what there is is EVERYONE FEELING BAD ABOUT THEM, which is how it ought to be -- but there are a few comments that give me a impression that Karen Miller ships Ahsoka/Rex. I'm not sure how I feel about this; on the one hand, Ahsoka is a baby, but on the other hand, technically Rex is probably the exact same age!)

The second book is less fun and more depressing than the first, as our guys spend most of it trapped, exhausted, and slowly being poisoned by local hazardous materials, but there's some good Senate politics stuff and also I'm legitimately interested in the Jedi ethical debates....

Other notable moments from the duology:

- the loving description of Palpatine standing there gushing publicly over Anakin while Obi-Wan and Yoda silently judge and Anakin dies a million deaths of embarrassment
- Anakin learning that Obi-Wan's friend? is someone?? that he used to bang???? and immediately going into another fit of shocked pearl-clutching, WHAT A HYPOCRITE, HOW VERY DARE
- five million iterations of Anakin bouncing off to do something heroic and impetuous while Obi-Wan shouts "ANAKIN, NO!"
- Obi-Wan: "You must admit now I was right to insist upon training Anakin, he's a credit to the Jedi." Yoda: "......your best you did!"