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Jan. 11th, 2007 02:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
skygiantsOkay, so this casting call for 'The Dark Is Rising' makes it look like the film is going to be painful beyond all measure.
ETA: It's about halfway down the page, and I can't figure out how to link directly to it. But the text is (Romania) - Send photograph & resumes ASAP to: Details Are only Available By Subscription.. Title: THE DARK IS RISING, Feature Film. EXEC PROD, Ron Schmidt; PROD, Marc Platt; DIR, David L. Cunningham; SCR, John Hodge. Shoot Dates: February, 2007 (in Romania). STORY: The film is about Will Stanton, who discovers on his eleventh birthday that he is the last of the "Old Ones," a group of immortal warriors who have dedicated their lives to fighting the forces of the Dark and he must undertake a difficult journey to defeat the evil powers that threaten the land. Breakdown-- Will Stanton: 13. Will is an American who lives in England with his family. Will is bullied and/or ignored by his older brothers, and Will is gloomily convinced that he's doomed to be a bookish, gawky oddball at the bottom of the pecking order. However, he is actually an innately cool kid who has not yet grown into his coolness; Professor John Stanton: 45-55. Will's father. Professor Stanton is an American physicist and college professor and he's paid a price for it. He is emotionally cool, authoritative and very remote from his children; The Rider: 30-40 years old man with icy malevolence who is masquerading as a simple village doctor when in fact he is an agent of Evil; Mrs. Mary Stanton: 40-50. She is the American mother of the Stanton six children. She works hard at protecting her husband and her family. She similar to her husband is not emotionally available to her kids and is very distant; Gwen Stanton: Will's younger sister, Gwen is an American, neat, upright girl of about 8 or 9. Unlike her brothers, who treat Will with amiable contempt, Gwen looks up to Will, loves him and dotes on him; Max Stanton: 19 or 20, an edgy young man with piercings and tattoos. Will's older brother. Max is the American, bohemian of the family. He is always inclined to question his father's authority; James Stanton: 17. Will's older American brother. James is mature, muscular and good looking, the object of admiring eyes. Busily looking for a girlfriend, James barely interacts with Will - especially when Maggie Barnes becomes the object of his affection; Robin Stanton & Paul Stanton: 15, Male. A pair of grungy American adolescents, Robin and Paul are identical or fraternal twin brothers, and they're still at the "horseplay" stage of development. Always ready to tease Will about his bookish ways, always willing to reinforce his fears of being a gawky oddball, Robin and Paul tease and bully and sometimes blow off Will. (Posted: November 2, 2006)
That being said? The description of James Stanton just makes me laugh and laugh and laugh. I may in fact have to see the finished film just for that.
ETA: It's about halfway down the page, and I can't figure out how to link directly to it. But the text is (Romania) - Send photograph & resumes ASAP to: Details Are only Available By Subscription.. Title: THE DARK IS RISING, Feature Film. EXEC PROD, Ron Schmidt; PROD, Marc Platt; DIR, David L. Cunningham; SCR, John Hodge. Shoot Dates: February, 2007 (in Romania). STORY: The film is about Will Stanton, who discovers on his eleventh birthday that he is the last of the "Old Ones," a group of immortal warriors who have dedicated their lives to fighting the forces of the Dark and he must undertake a difficult journey to defeat the evil powers that threaten the land. Breakdown-- Will Stanton: 13. Will is an American who lives in England with his family. Will is bullied and/or ignored by his older brothers, and Will is gloomily convinced that he's doomed to be a bookish, gawky oddball at the bottom of the pecking order. However, he is actually an innately cool kid who has not yet grown into his coolness; Professor John Stanton: 45-55. Will's father. Professor Stanton is an American physicist and college professor and he's paid a price for it. He is emotionally cool, authoritative and very remote from his children; The Rider: 30-40 years old man with icy malevolence who is masquerading as a simple village doctor when in fact he is an agent of Evil; Mrs. Mary Stanton: 40-50. She is the American mother of the Stanton six children. She works hard at protecting her husband and her family. She similar to her husband is not emotionally available to her kids and is very distant; Gwen Stanton: Will's younger sister, Gwen is an American, neat, upright girl of about 8 or 9. Unlike her brothers, who treat Will with amiable contempt, Gwen looks up to Will, loves him and dotes on him; Max Stanton: 19 or 20, an edgy young man with piercings and tattoos. Will's older brother. Max is the American, bohemian of the family. He is always inclined to question his father's authority; James Stanton: 17. Will's older American brother. James is mature, muscular and good looking, the object of admiring eyes. Busily looking for a girlfriend, James barely interacts with Will - especially when Maggie Barnes becomes the object of his affection; Robin Stanton & Paul Stanton: 15, Male. A pair of grungy American adolescents, Robin and Paul are identical or fraternal twin brothers, and they're still at the "horseplay" stage of development. Always ready to tease Will about his bookish ways, always willing to reinforce his fears of being a gawky oddball, Robin and Paul tease and bully and sometimes blow off Will. (Posted: November 2, 2006)
That being said? The description of James Stanton just makes me laugh and laugh and laugh. I may in fact have to see the finished film just for that.
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Date: 2007-01-11 10:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 10:10 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-11 10:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 10:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 10:15 pm (UTC)Oh, my childhood.
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Date: 2007-01-11 10:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 10:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 10:22 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-11 10:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 10:22 pm (UTC)(But: BUFF MANLY JAMES. *giggling like mad*)
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Date: 2007-01-11 10:19 pm (UTC)I cannot even fathom.
If Will hits people with swords, I will weep.
Copiously.
(AND WHY CAN'T HE BE CANADIAN, huh? HUH?)
I mean, since Britain is so inherently uncool, and let's not even mention Wales or Scotland . . . .
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Date: 2007-01-11 10:24 pm (UTC)But I will LAUGH THROUGH MY TEARS, because seriously, it's so improbable it's almost as funny as harem cow Will Stanton.
(Obviously what he really needs to be is FRENCH.)
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Date: 2007-01-11 11:10 pm (UTC)And all I can say is
Oh
My
Fucking
God.
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Date: 2007-01-11 11:12 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-11 11:15 pm (UTC)I have never even read the books and I am going WTF.
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Date: 2007-01-11 11:18 pm (UTC)Laughter of pain! But.
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Date: 2007-01-11 11:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 11:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-12 12:13 am (UTC)Okay!
James is mature, muscular and good looking, the object of admiring eyes.
I THINK I KNOW SOMEONE LIKE THAT AT THIS BAR
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:44 am (UTC)Just. Absolutely none of them are named 'Stanton'.
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Date: 2007-01-12 12:15 am (UTC)But.
AUGH.
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:45 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-12 12:27 am (UTC)KILL IT WITH FIRE.
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:46 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:18 am (UTC)And yeah, this film pretty much looks like it's going to be utter shite. THANKS HOLLYWOOD.
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:47 am (UTC)Does that make Bran Harry Potter?
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:26 am (UTC)Blodwen Rowlands: 35-40, a seemingly benevolent housewife who is secretly a smoldering temptress from the dark side. Has her sights set on Will. (Nicole Kidman wouldn't return our calls.)
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-12 02:04 am (UTC)*whistles*
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Date: 2007-01-12 02:22 am (UTC)ARG!
Well, that goes off of my list of things to see. Ever.
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Date: 2007-01-12 02:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-12 03:13 am (UTC)Well.
I'm off to find the
brain bleachplume moths, then.no subject
Date: 2007-01-12 06:42 pm (UTC)*optimistic*
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Date: 2007-01-12 05:55 pm (UTC)Have they even read the books? SCR, that stands for screenwriter/screenplay, right? Who is this John Hodge? We must all lench him. And, and, throw cows at him. Or something.
I'm just going to go hide over here now. And wonder if they're going to get Sean Astin to play James. XD
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Date: 2007-01-12 06:42 pm (UTC)