skygiants | Entries tagged with wtf

Last night I went to Zoolights with

jinian. This is an recurring holiday season event during which a local zoo gets itself gussied up in the evenings, drapes lights all over everything, serves overpriced vaguely festive fair food, and lets you check out the nocturnal animals and have photo opportunities with reindeer.

The animals were excellent, the reindeer also so, and the hot apple cider as tasty and overpriced as one would expect. Eventually, we ran out of nocturnal animals to bother and wandered into the region marked "Lights and Sights!"

Well, there were absolutely lights, and there were also ... certainly sights ...

( Cut for images and fridge horror )

MERRY CHRISTMAS, CHRISTIAN FRIENDS. I'll be over here, with the gambling and fried foods.

Crossposts: http://bookelfe.livejournal.com/430663.html

If you follow me on Twitter you've already gotten spammed with this, but I'm sorry this is going on every social media platform I own:

LES MIS 2D FIGHTER COMPUTER GAME

Featuring player characters such as Enjolras, Eponine, Jean Valjean, and ROBOJEAN. Why? WHY NOT.

My favorite part is when Marius uses his special move to summon an army of undead skeletal revolutionaries to defeat the police.

(That's not even true, my favorite part is when Eponine dramatically whisks away her cross-dressing jacket right before starting battle. BUT THE UNDEAD REVOLUTIONARIES ARE ALSO GOOD.)

YOU'RE WELCOME

Crossposts: http://bookelfe.livejournal.com/319559.html

So I am done! DONE WITH EVERYTHING, or at least everything that isn't optional extras like conference applications and so forth which I am not worrying about at this time. The point is: ONE YEAR DOWN, one to go.

In celebration of having turned in my archiving-apocalypse paper I guess it is only fitting that I take today to talk about the magical gift that fell into my lap courtesy of

genarti: Tomes and Talismans, otherwise known as AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OKAY.

So Tomes and Talismans is an educational TV series from 1986. It is meant to teach children about the value of LIBRARIES!

But because the nice people at the Mississippi Broadcasting Corporation don't want the kids to be bored, the story has a plot, and the plot is: ALIENS CAME TO EARTH AND SCARED AWAY ALL THE PEOPLE AND RAN AROUND DESTROYING EVERYTHING.

( My classmates kept asking me if I was making this up. I am not making it up, and I have screencaps to prove it. )

For any of you library-minded individuals who may be interested in investigating this gem of a series, or feel that you need a refresher on the proper use of microfiche in preventing the apocalypse, it is all up on YouTube for your viewing pleasure.

Crossposts: http://bookelfe.livejournal.com/290726.html

genarti and I were talking about the AMAZING TASTE we had as thirteen-year-olds last night, and one thing led to another, and, to make a long story short, Gen has just given me A PRESENT that I generously feel the need to share with you all!

genarti:
"I am beautiful," Firesong said, admiring a mirror while he adjusted the silver crest of his glorious hair. On his shoulder, Aya preened his own wing.
"I am more beautiful," sighed Edward to an exquisitely crafted pool of water. "But my heart is a monster's. This is the gorgeous chiseled face of a killer, Firesong."
"Now, now, boys, you're both pretty," snapped Elspeth, and she stormed off to soak in a hot spring.
"She's got a point," said Firesong.
And then they made out.
THERE YOU GO.

(Gen says, to save what little reputation she has left, I should add that I requested it, but actually what I requested was Edward Cullen/Vanyel. I am okay with her edits though.)

ANYWAY, in honor of this gem, I am declaring OPEN SEASON on hilarious crossover pairings of overwrought YA heroes and heroines. EMBRACE YOUR INNER THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLDS, MY FRIENDS. (Gen has also promised to try her hand at Edward Cullen/Neko-sensei! >:D)

Crossposts: http://bookelfe.livejournal.com/256648.html

Three posts in one day! WHAT IS THIS MADNESS. But

gramarye1971 has instructed me to post the photoshopped romance novel book cover she purchased from me for

help_japan, and I am not one to ignore Shannon's dictates.

( Below the cut! )

Crossposts: http://bookelfe.livejournal.com/232003.html

Before going to see PHANTOM OF THE OPERA 2: LOVE NEVER DIES,

rowanberries and I applied the wisdom I had gained after my recent excursion to see Spiderman: Turn Off the Dark, which is to say that we went and fortified ourselves with a drink first.

I . . . don’t know how much it helped, to be honest, but I think at the very least it greatly contributed to the hilarity of the notes that Amy took during the performance!

( Everything You Always Wanted To Know About The Musical Sequel To Phantom of the Opera But Had Too Strong a Sense of Self-Preservation To Find Out For Yourself )

When the show is over, Amy and I stagger outside, bid each other a stunned farewell chorus of “WHAT DID WE JUST WATCH?” and take to our trains.

I am safely seated and have a book out when suddenly I hear, I hear, faint and tinny, “DUUUUN . . . dun dun dun dun DUUUUUN . . . .”

My panicked thought processes go something like this: "Is it a cell phone? I don’t see a cell phone . . . and we’re underground and there’s no way a cell phone ring would go on this long anyway, so . . . oh god, HE IS ACTUALLY THERE. In voluntarily choosing to see Phantom 2, I have DOOMED myself to having the Phantom of the Opera . . . inside my mind!"

Then I look across the way and realize there is a woman listening to her iPod, which is where the soundtrack must be coming from. And it keeps playing ALL THE WAY HOME.

And the worst part is, if it comes to New York and certain ladies of my acquaintance still want to see it . . . I will totally see it again.

vivien529 asked me for my top five "fandom wtf!?!?" moments, which is a question that could be interpreted two ways!

The first way - and the way I think Viv probably meant it - is the top five times that fandom made me spit my diet coke out at the screen, but to be honest there are SO MANY of these moments that narrowing them down would be simultaneously well-nigh impossible and almost pointless, seeing as for lo these several years I have reached the kind of zen state re: fandom in which I can't even be shocked anymore, just laugh. Of course there is Care Bears BDSM fic! IT'S INEVITABLE. Certainly SGA needs a girl scout cookies AU! WHY NOT. There are so many points of similarity between Giles and a weretiger? WELL OBVIOUSLY. This is just what fandom does.

What is far more likely to make me go WTF!?!?! is when an actual for-profit piece of fiction seems to think that it is in fact cracktastic fanfic, and this is how I have chosen to compile my list!

( Top Five WTF Moments In Fiction )

OKAY, GUYS, YOUR TURN. I will be disappointed if I don't spend today shrieking either because of things I tragically forgot to include, or because of things I was probably much happier not knowing!

So I mentioned

genarti and I were going to be watching some episodes of the old FMA series!

FOR THOSE WHO MAY BE CURIOUS, Gen has our extremely deep and thoughtful notes over here.

(What's hilarious is how they get increasingly LONGER AND MORE INDIGNANT as a.) it gets later and later and b.) the plot gets MORE AND MORE CONFUSING. I was going to say, "c.) as we drink more," but Gen over my shoulder points out that this is a lie and we were totally sober for the last few episodes, and she is probably right. I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ANYMORE.

SCENE:

innerbrat and

rushin_doll 's apartment, living room, evening
PLAYING: the television

DEBI: Hah, I see, that character is the Tallulah!
BECCA: . . . what?
DEBI: You know, like from Bugsy Malone.
BECCA: . . . what?
DEBI and ANA, IN HORRIFIED UNISON: You've never seen Bugsy Malone?!?!
BECCA: . . . what?
ANA: It's a musical! About gangsters! They all have funny moustaches! It's made for you!
DEBI: Also, there aren't any cast members over the age of fourteen!
BECCA: . . . what?

Needless to say, I have now seen Bugsy Malone, and have upgraded my '. . . what?' to an 'oh my god, WHAT?'

( Cut for images )

I . . . I just . . . I have no room to talk, I know. I mean, I love Newsies. I am a wholehearted supporter of ridiculous fake moustaches and of terrible child-actor dancing in musicals. And yet . . . there are SO MANY CHOICES HERE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND.

I had a very awesome and theatrical weekend! I saw Promises, Promises on Broadway, and A Winter's Tale in Central Park (not to mention the first episodes of Gargoyles in

batyatoon's guest room.)

I am not going to talk about any of those things right now.

Instead, I am going to tell you about a piece of lost theatrical glory: David Hasselhoff's star turn in Jekyll and Hyde: The Musical, which I cleverly talked

rushin_doll and

chlorrel into watching with me this weekend.

Now, I know some of you are already thinking: but where can I acquire this genius spectacle? But now you don't have to! Because I am going to give you the full Jekyll and Hyde experience here from your very own LJ.

(No need to thank me.)

( Many, many, MANY terrifying screencaps of The Hoff under the cut. Also, needless to say, spoilers. )

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